A blog post that has been making the Internet rounds the last few weeks begins with this title: “Why my kids are NOT the center of my world.” The article is from a mom who says she loves her two sons enough to not overindulge them with attention or false praise.
“My kids are NOT the center of my world, and that’s quite simply because they aren’t the center of any world, anywhere,” she writes on her blog, here.
Her post sparked comments and reposts around the Internet from Moms who said things like “Amen, Sister!” or “Right On! Someone finally said it!” I so wanted to join in on this chorus of moms and be all awesome and totally on board with proclaiming my kids are not the center of my world. I wanted to be a cool mom, too.
But, I couldn’t do it. In fact, this post irked me. I couldn’t stop thinking about why it bothered me so much because I actually agree with most of the author’s points.
I agree that many children today are completely overindulged by their parents and think their demands should be met first and completely. I 100 percent agree that children are way too coddled. They are handed answers, excuses and compliments like candy.
She writes, “Parents who make their children the center of their universe are not doing anyone any favors. Obviously, as parents, we love our children more than anything. But dropping everything to cater to their every need is only going to lead to a very rude awakening once they enter the real world.”
I couldn’t agree more.
But still, there it was … the irking. So I thought about this blog post and my somewhat mixed reaction to it. And then, I think I finally settled on why it bugged me. It was the title: “Why my kids are NOT the center of my world.”
I am sure this author was really going for the shock and awe factor here with this title, and it worked. Her post received lots of hits and hundreds of comments. But I have a serious problem with her statement. I do not think I am an overindulgent or enabling parent, but I am proud to say my children are the center of my world.
I’d like to ask this author: If your children aren’t the center of your world, then what is?
No, our daily lives and schedules should not revolve around our children’s every whim. But even when I am allowing my child to fail, she is the center of my world. It would be easier to rescue her from pain and failure, but I don’t because her growth and future is solidly affixed as my life’s goal.
Every child deserves a parent who sets limits. Every child deserves to get frustrated so he finds his own solutions. Every child deserves a chance at self-sufficiency and selflessness.
But every child also deserves to wake up in world where they know mom and dad would drop everything and do anything for them. They deserve to be the center of their mother’s world.