Bring on the epidural!

Somewhere in the third trimester, I always have a lightning bolt moment when I realize that there is a 7-pound human being inside of me that has to get out.

Yes, of course I always have this knowledge somewhere in the back of my mind, but there’s always a moment when this realization comes screaming to the front of my mind. Then, I have a mild panic attack. In my first pregnancy, it hit me while driving down I-15 after work. This time, it hit me while I took a tour of the maternity ward where I will deliver this summer.

So it always helps to relieve my panic to think that I will be getting an epidural early in the labor process. Sure, things may not always go according to plan, but I will hopefully be getting a nice little dose of pain relief before this baby stats barreling toward the sunlight.

I don’t feel guilty about this. I don’t think it makes me weak or less of a mother.

But on my maternity tour this week, the nurse said several times how we should all be trying to give birth “naturally” if we could. She even pointed out that if we absolutely must have an epidural after exhausting all of our “natural birth techniques, then we will be at a disadvantage and unable to move around the room. I thought it was really inappropriate for this woman to give medical advice served with a dose of guilt.

I don’t think I should have to justify my choice to use an epidural, or have to prove that I did my best to do it “naturally” before caving in and taking the drugs. I know there are plenty of women out there who are insanely tough and go through childbirth without drugs. To them, I say, way to go, but I want my drugs early and often. And I don’t think my child’s birth will be “unnatural” because of it.

As far as I can remember, there was no awards ceremony in the recovery room for toughest mom or most heroic birth. All that mattered was bringing a healthy baby safely into the world – not the level of pain required to do that.

I’d love to hear from both sides of this issue. If you had an epidural, how did you decide to use drugs? Have you ever felt guilty because of your choice? If you delivered without drugs, what made you want to go that route and how did you manage the pain?